Anybody Out There??!

Does anybody feel the way I feel right now?  I have never felt so much pain until tonight.  The words I heard tonight felt like someone took a butcher knife and stabbed me endlessly in the chest.  What's left??  Sheer existance... the love is gone, the respect is gone...what's left??  I feel like someone stripped away my clothing and then stripped away even my skin.   I feel like I've been stripped naked and now I'm being looked at with such disgrace... such hatred... such disgust... is imperfection punishable? 
Consider me officially punished.

Rescue

Loneliness is the saddest feeling.  I wouldn't wish it on anyone.  I miss the days when everything was so much simpler.  I miss being around all the people that love me.  I fee like right now I'm not around anyone that loves me.  I'm surrounded by hate and bitterness, and it makes my heart ache.  I feel like I'm being attacked, but I have no idea why.  Some people are just so bitter.  And the sad part about it is that the bitterness is so deeply ingrained that they can't even notice it.  Loneliness... its that feeling when you just wish there was somebody that came up behind you in your deepest darkest moment and hugged u tight and whispered in your ear, "Everythings gonna be alright."

Worn Out!

Today it became clear to me what I somewhat already knew:  that I'm a very cheerful, playful person.  Being around people who are serious and bitter is not a good match for me.  I hate feeling restricted from everything I want to do, big or small.  Why do I have to have a strategy for carrying out the simplest things?  The very things that interest me and excite me, are nothing but irritating to others, like a gnat in the eyes.  Don't do this, don't do that, don't say this, don't say that... I feel so restricted, like I'm a teenager all over again!  Turn the lights off! Don't take a bath, take a shower!  Why is the milk running out too fast?!  Constant fussing!  Simple topics of conversation: Back in my high school days...Don't talk about it!  All these rules!  And just like a 17 year old, there's not very much I can do about anything.  I don't even have a car!  It seems like the times that I laugh the most are when I'm playing with my kids.  Help!